Psychedelic
by refracted
Summary: "Do you want me to lie or say the truth?" The tears were bottled within her eyes. "Lie," Sasuke answered. She took a while to reply—more than she should've, he thought. "Alright." Breathe in, breathe out. "I love you, Sasuke-kun."
1. Brighten

**Psychedelic**

* * *

><p><em>You would know how the time flies,<em>

_Only yesterday was the time of our lives._

/

Team 7, I had always thought, was akin to a rainbow.

I would like to believe that I saw a lot of rainbows in my lifetime, but to be completely honest with you, I have not. Most of the time I see a mix of red, green or black. Red coloured the all-consuming impact of evil; green a draining sickness; black the banality of life – a scarcity of achievement.

In some instances I am able to estimate the colours that will appear even before the time has come. Team 7 was such an instance. No matter how many times I stared them in the face or passed them by, they were always vibrant with colours. I had grown to accept that sometimes they weren't always the porcelain glowing of a spectrum; there would be times at which they faded, and they would then be hardly visible to me. But, regardless, the rainbow was still there.

Usually I wasn't that interested in people. I had drifted by humanity more times that you can count. You would never be able to imagine how many faces I passed, most which had their eyes closed, however all the same pleading, pleading for me to stop. It wavers my poise, sometimes, how humans hold onto life. Nonetheless my poise is always still held in the end, intensified, unconquerable and inevitable.

And to my disappointment, I was interested in Team 7. My job was far too busy to concentrate on one person alone, but, every time I passed them I spent a little more time longer. I took time to observe them, how they changed and how they had not. How the rainbow grown or how it had faltered.

Later in their journey when they indeed do become separated, it had frustrated me that the rainbow was no longer shining brightly. Despite this, I had to admit that it made these mere humans much more interesting. I could now see their true colours, so to say, and how each of their shades stood divided.

Undoubtedly it was much more stunning, to me at least, when they came together and intertwined with all of their hues. Maybe it was just the aesthetics; I had always felt much more at peace with pretty and simple colours. But I could not deny that primary and distinctive colours would always emerge with more intricacy.

Funnily enough, the first time I see Team 7, they are splashed with the colour of black.

/

Yes, don't mind me, saying 'splashed' was a specific choice, for they were not painted in black.

After all, they were many years away from dying, but the most of Team 7 had beforehand been splattered with the mortality of life. Haruno Sakura was the only exception; however, forget that for now – I'll get to that later.

Much of the people in Team 7 were new faces to me, apart from Hatake Kakashi. Though to me Kakashi was quite a young fellow, he knew me much more than the other humans did. Kakashi had never seen me personally, but I had passed by him more times that he could remember. I had quite a nasty habit of stealing his allies away from him, namely Minato Namikaze, Orochimaru and Uchiha Obito.

I was quite surprised to see a familiar Uchiha in the Team 7 group, being Uchiha Sasuke. Obito had been such a fighter and stubborn against me. Most of all, he had died with the thoughts of other people. It had always confused me why some humans, though quite rare, thought of someone other than themselves when they died. They were the people who were dying, for Christ's sake. Not other people.

Admittedly, it filled me with gentle despair.

I wondered if Sasuke would be the same – defying against me. He was merely a child then, though, so I knew I could not make many judgments. With my many run-ins with Kakashi, I had allocated the colours of green and grey towards him. Green was because he was indeed down-to-earth and very honest. He was supportive of others, and later in time, I would grow to know that he was the sustainable ground of Team 7.

If I wanted to think negatively, though, he would be green because even despite the fact he had indeed never known me personally; he had been through many sicknesses that stroked him with the very fingers of death. Though I had known Kakashi more than the rest of Team 7, he still remained to be much hidden to me. He was lightly shady, not in a snide and plotting way, but in a well-kept and calm manner. I'm sure that he was aware of my presence many times in the past, but he never acknowledged me.

He never even passed me a fleeting glance. He was too much engrossed with the people who had died. It didn't quite enrage me. It just confused me. A lot of things about humans wrecked curiosity within me.

The next person I absorbed was Uzumaki Naruto. Oh, did I know this boy all too well. He had death practically withering inside of him, but of course, that fox demon could never compete with me. Said fox demon had made me so busy beforehand, as I remember all too clearly. It made me smile sadistically of some kind, of how happy this boy could be, even when I was essentially living inside of him.

Despite of how he was oblivious to the doom he could bring, I knew what colours he would be the second I saw him with Team 7. He would simply be sparkled with the sentiments of yellow and orange, both which outlined the main emotion I did not know – happiness. I had little doubt that this would change, either. Naruto, I had judged to be as valiant, an individual.

And even when in due time I was to become alive (oh, the irony) in him, I knew he would still be raging against me.

Afterwards, I drifted my glance towards Haruno Sakura. I knew her the least, so I could not state which colours she would be. At the moment, she would just be black, until the future would prove different. Though I could not give her a colour, I could deduce a few things from her.

She was at a young age of twelve. They all were, excluding Kakashi. Sakura had lived quite a sheltered and safe past. (I concluded it had to be sheltered and safe as she had never seen me). And regardless of how shallow she seemed, she shined the brightest to me. Though I had never seen her before, she was such a glowing human. The smile that graced her lips and the light that trailed in her eyes left me... perhaps afraid.

I know that I have always deemed myself as unstoppable, but indeed, there is one thing there that can stop me. It is the will to live. And someone who shines this bright, I believe, one day have the will to live so strong that it doesn't just cover herself, but also everyone else – like a refractive shield of light that coiled against my threats.

Even though now Naruto had a silly infatuation with her, Sasuke barely realised her existence and Kakashi shook his head at her fairytale-like stance, I knew she would become the important tie of Team 7 that would bound them together. Out of everyone else, she would grow the most, as she started with no colour at all.

And I was always right. Well, most of the time.

Last but not least was Uchiha Sasuke. Even compared with the kyuubi and the copy ninja, Sasuke had brushed by me the most times. Kakashi might've lived for much longer, only thirty or so years, but Sasuke knew me personally. He had seen me staring right into his face and laughing like a ghoul. He knew me all too well, and he hated me.

I can't blame him, though. I might have justifications for my choices, but in no way am I fair, or kind.

Perhaps Sasuke didn't even know he shed hatred against me. The form I came into being was by Uchiha Itachi, his brother, and someone else that Sasuke wasn't aware of who also played part in the notorious Uchiha massacre.

Remember: it may be someone's choice to kill somebody else, but it will always be up to me if they die.

I take forms as many people. I live in their bodies as they make me survive with their thoughts of murder, murder and murder. Once they perform the act I am swept out of their body and I kneel down to the victim. I slip my hand onto, what is normally, their cold cheek and decide. In Sasuke's situation, he was bleeding and being knocked back by his own brother.

He was bleeding and bleeding so profusely. I remember how icy he felt, but how warm the tears were that cascaded down his pale skin. I remember how unlike the rest of the 99.9% of the world whom would've given up in his situation and let me take them, Sasuke fought. He became the 0.01%. He did not beat me, but he made me let him live. I remember that when I drifted away and whispered to myself that it wasn't his time yet, I saw his expression harden like a frozen rock. His eyes had become free of sadness but isolated into emptiness. I had noted to myself, at the time that he would never cry again. Not for a long time coming, at least.

Now, it might be unusual for me to aid wisdom in life as I am the one who ends it all, but please, listen for a second. Since that event Sasuke had stopped noticing the beauty of life. He had never looked at anything anymore. He had just looked _through _it. Everything to Sasuke was rotten and decaying. Even now, as I observe him with his new team, he is in his own desolated world.

Sasuke, to me, was nothing but an idiosyncratic blue. It wasn't as simple as his usual attire consisting of blue clothing. It was because even though he had separated himself with dissociation, he would always be strong. He would always have this innocence within him before the massacre happened. He would always have a heart, no matter how far you had to dig.

He was a clear, beautiful and crystalline blue.

I had well established Team 7 now. As the next gush of wind swept by me, I faded away.

I had other duties to do.

I always did.

/

The next time I passed by Team 7, it was on their first mission.

To be honest I never expected my next visit to be so soon, and especially, forced in the way it was. I had expected my next visit to be simply another observation, but it wasn't. I was going there to perform my duty. Indeed, I was, when I came upon the situation.

Sasuke was bleeding again.

He was lying unconscious on the cold, hard ground in between many icicles. The wielder of such ice was someone I knew well, being Haku. He was such a blinded boy, I always thought. Blinded by his protector Momochi Zabuza. Now, I never really despised humans, but I could say I didn't prefer emotional manipulators of which Zabuza was.

It didn't matter anyway. His doomsday clock was ticking down, and so was Haku's.

I was intelligent enough to deduce that Sasuke had taken the sharp spikes in his chest against his will. Sasuke, if anything, was a very talented and intuitive grasped boy. By his own choice he could avoid many incoming offensive attacks with his agility; but here he was, knocked down.

I sighed. Naruto was still such the idiot, yelling at the unconscious Sasuke. I perked my ears to listen to what Naruto had to exclaim at the inappropriate moment. He was asking Sasuke why he saved him.

At that moment, my heart stung. Yes, I have a heart. Many hearts. They are always incessantly beating, much faster than you can imagine. I have collected the hearts of others, that's why. I floated towards where Sasuke was situated. Naruto was at the moment fighting Haku, but they couldn't see me anyway. They were too subdued into their battle to notice Sasuke's life whispering away.

I wrapped my arms around Sasuke like a constricting snake, but someone pulled me away from him. I compressed my hold stronger until it was choking, but still, someone pulled me away from him. I heard the several murmurs telling me that it wasn't his time yet. I hadn't realised that I was no longer surrounded by the icicles, and neither was Sasuke. I was in an open area.

As I had not let Sasuke out of my deathly grasp yet, I felt a warm rush of heat upon me. A warm rush of comfort. A warm rush of saviour. _The will to live. _The chains of salvation wrapped around the lone Uchiha and it was then I knew I had lost... and I wasn't going to give up.

_No!_ I felt myself screeching. Call me sadistic as you may, but I liked to do my job. I liked to end the pain of people's lives and spare their screams. Though Sasuke was not audibly screaming, I could well hear his struggles, and they echoed in my ears. I felt regret and disgust.

I threw my head up to look at who dared to break my job, and it was _her. _Haruno Sakura. I couldn't believe it. It was that weak, shallow girl with no colour taking him out of my arms. Her embrace was akin to a wool jumper wrapping around you during the coldest of winters, but with so much more potency and solace. Slowly, but surely, Sasuke was no longer looking at me now. He was passing me by.

I let go, grievingly. She had won. He was hers, now.

I could only go back to observing. She had laid her head across his chest, sobbing loudly. Unbeknownst to her, I had realised that her touch had a healing capability. Even with her sobbing that might've seemed obnoxious and her weight upon him that might've also seemed unnecessary, she was saving him. She was not saving him from the loss of blood or the pinning of spikes. She was saving him from me.

Not even five seconds later, he opened his eyes.

At that moment I decided that Sakura did have a colour. She had won against me, and very few people do that. Even less people save _someone else _from me. It was not her dying... I could not understand how her exploding emotions that now seemed like a trigger against my head could be so strong.

Sakura was the colour of white. I left this colour to a rare amount of people. I left this colour to the saviours. They often scar me the most – they make me give up and watch the survivors escape from me. If I was to be rude and childish, I would say she was my enemy. But fear not, I always keep my stance. I always keep my confidence. This would be the only time she would win against me.

I liked my jobs to be done quickly without any hassle. But no matter how much I liked them that way, I knew it wasn't going to be so with Haruno Sakura.

I seethed as her blistering colour of white nipped at my eyes, pushing me away. There was too much survival and life here for me. It was my time to go now. I had other things to do – picking up the hearts of Haku and Momochi Zabuza.

/

I had come to realise that Sasuke was the main object of incoming damage.

Every time I had returned to Team 7, he was always harmed. Whether it was because of his eagerness to defeat enemies or protectiveness he had grown to feel accorded to his teammates, I didn't know, and I didn't care. I knew every time I had been called for to Team 7, I would gather no hearts. Sasuke was just as much as a fighter as Uchiha Obito, I realised, and perhaps maybe even better.

There would also always be Sakura softening her teammates resolve and hunger for bloodlust. She still remained the brilliant white, and sometimes it made me angry how her presence would so much defy me, but on more times than I would like to admit, it touched my heart.

There was one instance that Sakura had become the object of harm, and it was when both Naruto and Sasuke were unconscious. I thought surely, that against three other enemies, she would be downed in three seconds, and I would be kneeling down beside her and carrying her heart. I was foolish to think such, though. Even despite the unbalanced fight, Sakura held strong with the will to live.

She got beaten and stabbed again and again. The blood that streaked out of her body was so intensified for me: I had alerted senses towards blood – it was how I located my victims. There were so many times that she was knocked down, but she would never scream, or shed a tear. She would just stand up again, pull on a weak smile, and continue.

At one moment one of the enemies had had her held by the hair. The enemy was a female, and of course, she took the side of verbal abuse. She was snickering at how ugly Sakura was and how pitiful her attempts to protect Sasuke and Naruto were. With every insult, every stab and every beating, Sakura's innocence was being tainted. Her colour was being blotched by black and red.

But Sakura was resilient.

With her intelligence, she took the simplest solution. She ignored the other girl's insults and cut her hair, releasing the hold of the enemy upon her. Usually, hair would be seen as so important towards females, especially since Sakura was still twelve. But I'm sure if Kakashi were here right now, he'd be smiling at Sakura finally releasing her fairytale-like stance.

She was becoming a heroine.

I knew that there was no place for me here now, but I could not stop watching. Sasuke came out of consciousness, a new swirling purple aura around him. His eyes were red, the _Sharingan. _He was smirking. His smirk looked so much like mine in given situations – sadistic, bloodthirsty and harsh. He clenched his fists with the new-found power.

I stared at Sasuke. I could not leave now, for I was living in him, as a curse. As the curse which would bring him to his downfall. For the first time in my life, I unwillingly took the form of a human.

He looked at Sakura's current battered and bludgeoned state. She was on her knees, her hair ripped, her eyes wide in fear – not from Sasuke, but _for _Sasuke. Usually, he would've said nothing and just protected her, but now a snarl ripped at his lips. "Who did that to you?"

She didn't reply amongst all of the shock. Sasuke looked _evil. _I didn't blame her. I felt just as sick.

The crystalline blue I had already grown adjusted to began to meld into red.

"Sakura," he said again, a menacing growl. "_Who _did that to you?"

A snicker erupted from behind him. Silently, I frowned. He had just begun his own doomsday clock, that boy, that enemy.

He was far too arrogant for his own good. "_I _did," the enemy replied in such a tone, as if he was proud of the beating he had given to Sakura. "She just smelt so good, her innocence, her _blood_!"

I knew all too well that at times nearing death; blood did smell so pure, so strong. But I didn't follow usual tradition – I knew that to Team 7, hurting Sakura was a sin. Harming something so gentle and vulnerable. Killing someone who only tried to save.

It didn't take long for Sasuke to react and fling towards the enemies. It took even less time, too, for him to pummel them into a state similar to that of Sakura's. I felt the poisonous power throbbing in his veins. I felt the surging supremacy consume the entirety of him, and being inside of him with the existence of murder, murder and murder, I began to shatter.

The enemies weren't staring at Sasuke when he ripped them apart. They were staring at me.

Sasuke, despite of what happened to him in the past, was never a killer. It might've been his hands you saw that pounded the enemies, but it was my skin that they felt. It was his voice that was audible but my smile that contaminated his expression.

And suddenly, once again, I felt Sasuke being pulled away from me. Sakura had run up and hugged Sasuke in such a grip that even compared to me, it was painfully clasping. She told him to stop amongst teary sobs. She told _me _to stop. She knew I was here.

She knew that this was not _her Sasuke-kun._

This time, I was not defiant. I let him go easily and glided towards the victims. It was now up to Sasuke to separate himself from me entirely and regain himself. After seconds of the embrace, Sasuke had collapsed at the relinquishing of power and was instantly knocked into unconsciousness.

Before I left the horrid scene that had the grass painted with blood, I took one last glance, the hearts of the enemies in my hands. Sakura was stroking Sasuke's hair in a mother like-fashion. She may have looked completely and utterly wrecked then, I agree, but it didn't matter how many wounds she had. All that mattered was that when Sasuke woke up, he was coloured in blue.

I never wanted to see him stained with red again – but it was bound to happen.

I was always inevitable.

/

Be disappointed, if you may.

I am as well.

I am disappointed in a lot of things. And for once, it wasn't because a human escaped from my finishing grip. It was because I was leisurely killing someone who had so much potential. He had so many flying colours.

Though Uchiha Sasuke was not physically dead – he would not be for quite a while – he was growing to be emotionally vacant, and that was the worst kind. He used to be so blue, I remember, and don't mind me. I know that in many humans' opinions, I'm meant to be hostile, passionate, and most of all free of remorse. It was my job. I was meant to be shameless.

But it's hard to not be shameless, when I'm killing my own rainbow.

Sasuke's colours dimmed as the year went by. He began to be sealed with more thoughts of murder, revenge and replenishment in the most gruesome form. I grew, reluctantly, with this development; and I was able to see how he wanted his family to be renewed by blood on his hands. To him, this was the only option.

I started to think what happened to this logical, smart and justified driven boy. It's funny, sometimes, how you can't help to ask yourself what happened – even when you know what (or who) the answer is. You know what the answer is, because you can look in the mirror and get the answer in a simple second. Of course, I am not reflected by anything, but I can pretend that I'm alike humans. It often gets mundane how I can't understand human emotions.

Excuse me, I had forgotten. Admittedly I can be reflected by one thing in life. And it's usually in the eyes of my dying victims. So perhaps, when I eventually get to see myself in Sasuke's closing eyes, I will feel the ultimatum of torment (defeat, failure) wash over me as I deserve. It will begin like a curling storm, strike me hard as a flood and die out with a nostalgic recovery.

I try to avoid the scene in front of me but I am alive in Sasuke, burning and hissing as a flame. The flame's fingers, I notice, spit out like death's touch. They are reaching for Naruto. Yes, Naruto was Sasuke's teammate, Sasuke's best friend. Why are they fighting? I don't understand it any more than you do, but at all of the same time, I do entirely. I understand the limited level of the need for power, but I do not understand the depth of emotion underlining it.

I hear the deafening chirping, akin to sweet, innocent birds, but it is twisted, wicked lightning. In time, lightning would become Sasuke's essence. At the palm of Sasuke's hand an impossible light churns, and I realise that Naruto has mirrored this with his own technique. Naruto's technique is far more powerful and impacting as a blunt force, but Sasuke's is fuelled with more hatred and is chronic.

I smell Sakura's blood enter the scene as it is much more simple and saccharine than the rest. She is running, determined, unafraid. Unafraid that she is about to interfere with the clashing of two ultimate techniques: _chidori _and _rasengan. _Sasuke's chidori, I can sense, is slowly transforming into a mind of its own – an animalistic and hungry need to destroy.

Trust me; I know this feeling all too well. I am such an obliterator that when I conduct what Sasuke is doing now, all of my senses dim so that I can't feel the passion, the lust, the need. But with the sight of Sakura running with screams to stop, the fire within Sasuke falters: flinching backwards at the thought of hurting Sakura.

_Hurting Sakura is a sin._

But the flame still heaves forward, its potency exhilarating. The triumph of authority overtakes Sasuke and he is unable to stop, even from harming Sakura. Naruto, I can tell, is trying so hard to pull back. He's such an amiable boy, that one. After months he still puts Sakura in utter importance.

I close my eyes as I feel these two great powers coming together. I cannot imagine what the collision of chidori and rasengan would do, but it would surely disintegrate Sakura as easily as cyanide would over a leaf. Though Sakura proves as quite an adversity towards me, I prefer not to overcome it yet. I do not want to feel her heavy heart in my hands.

And at once when the red sky above me spills into green, I know that I will not have to feel such a thing. Kakashi dives in at time. No matter how late he was, I found that he always came at the most opportune moment. He hurls out both Sasuke's and Naruto's defences, the power of the chidori and rasengan dispersing into thin air. The impossible light disappears, and everything is still again.

Naruto is left hunched onto the ground at the repelling, but Sasuke is well held and standing, though his head was facing down, hidden by his black bangs. Kakashi pushes Naruto away, telling him silently that he needs to take a break and calm down. He walks to Sakura next, patting her on the back and smiling at her act of putting her allies first, but her tearful emerald eyes are too concentrated on Sasuke to even notice. The sensei sighs. He knew his team was going to be difficult; they were filled with such diverse talents and goals.

He takes step by step slowly towards Sasuke. He knows that the boy is probably enraged beyond belief now. Sasuke only wanted to examine his strength, and now the opportunity was thwarted away from him. Well, Sasuke's ideology of examination. He is still composed; nonetheless, not even panting like Naruto was from the exhaust of energy.

"Sasuke," Kakashi speaks, quietly, cautiously. The last thing that he wants is an explosive response from the Uchiha. "What was that?"

Sasuke ignores his question. At this point of time, I would declare him as stubborn. I find it bizarre that he wants to keep to himself. Keeping to himself would only increase the intensification of my absorption of him.

Kakashi thinks for a moment, deciding. "We need to get that cursed seal off you."

Then, Sasuke turns towards Kakashi stealthily and glares at him. Oh, if looks could kill. Unfortunately, Sasuke's glances could never come into comparison with mine.

Sasuke scowls. "I don't need help," he growls, emphasising each word between gritted teeth.

I start to frown myself. _You do need help, _I start to think. _You need help to stay away from me. _But I know just as well as you do, that my thoughts are useless. It is his choice whether he wants the separation, and I would gladly give it to him. However, Sasuke didn't want to stay away from me, did he? He wanted the full package. He didn't just want his ghastly impression of the replenishing of his clan; he wanted everything that came with it. He wanted blood, he wanted desire, he wanted passion, he wanted fulfilment and he wanted revenge.

And for the first time, Kakashi stands on the same level that I do. We both see his upcoming downfall – his disease, and the sensei knows cannot cure it. For I am the poison, and he is the cure.

Kakashi just retreats back to the rest of Team 7. He could pretend and say that it was not in his hands to do anything for the situation, but he knows that he could. He is just filled with too much anguish at his own failure. He cannot save his own prodigy, the boy he had picked from the start to be a surrogate son, and maybe, Sasuke might've grown to feel the same way back. But now, he is watching that being shattered like glass in front of him. And even worse, he knows he cannot put it back together again. The glass pieces are frosted and sharp, they pierce his skin at any attempt to try.

Sasuke may be only gone for now, but gone for now seems a lot like gone for good.

/

The next time I see Team 7, it seems like a rendition of the event before, of some sorts.

But renditions were meant to be beautiful performances with interweaving of several instruments: cooperation, unity, affinity. I arrive at the scene as Naruto is bleeding abundantly, and it reminds me of how Sasuke had been five years ago at the Uchiha Massacre. I know who had done this to Naruto... and sadly, even now, I never want to admit it. I never wanted to admit that Sasuke was starting to follow the path of his own brother, whom, ironically, was the man he wanted to kill.

Itachi had killed his most loved ones, and I wondered if Sasuke was ever going to emulate that 'achievement.' A couple of months ago, if you had asked me that, I would've given you a firm no. But be shocked as you may, I am actually wrong.

Though anyone else in Naruto's condition would've been far by deceased, I knew that Naruto's superfluous regeneration rate at this stage had saved him from me. The rain was clattering down like hard rocks, and though the weather was probably not at all preferable to most people, I felt that it was quite appropriate for this moment.

I could sense Sasuke not too far away as he was in a similar condition to that of Naruto's: just not entirely unconscious. He was fading away slowly from me, hinting that his pace was barely dragging him along. Maybe he did feel portions of remorse, after all. Perhaps not all of his blue had been polluted into red and black. I noticed that a scratched forehead band had been left beside Naruto's side. Naruto had his forehead band still perched firmly on his own forehead, so I knew that this was Sasuke's – a saddening symbolism of his betrayal.

Soon Naruto would wake up when I would be gone, but I was sure that he would understand what had happened. Nothing to worry about, though, he was not alone. I couldn't help but to visit Sakura to see how she was coping with his defection from Konoha, only to find her unconscious as well. She was on a bench, laid so straight but gently on her back that I knew it had been done from Sasuke's hands. He must've knocked her out, I concluded. Such a harsh and abrupt cutting end to a bond.

Like death.

Nonetheless, I always had the ability, as mentioned before, to take the form of humans. It worked best when they were far by deceased or simply unconscious. I thought that this might've been the time. Perhaps it was invading her personal mind, but I couldn't help my curiosity. I placed my icy hands on either side of her face and closed my eyes. I could feel the hot stickiness of her cheeks that were caused by the streaking remnants of tears. Her face, though, as a whole was so, so warm.

I opened my eyes again. I couldn't help to realise how soft she looked, how gentle, how vulnerable. She was now in such a dream state, I knew. By the morning I would be long gone, not just because I had other things to do, but because I didn't want to see her expression when she woke up. Before I could begin my practises, her pale lips started moving.

"I love you, Sasuke-kun. So much."

My incessantly beating hearts all clenched when the tears re-appeared.

"Don't leave me. Please stay."

Now, I've always been one for honesty, and I felt like telling her that Sasuke had left. I was always used to breaking people. But I didn't want to break her.

Hurting Sakura was a sin.

Nonetheless, I couldn't take it anymore. I shut my eyes once again and began. Warps of her memories hit me like shimmering earthquakes, each impact so quick, so sharp. Even with someone as indomitable and heartless as I was meant to be, the agony that Sakura felt was easily empathised by me.

Usually, agony is used to describe an event of real catastrophe or tragedy. But when you think about Sakura… someone who really has had a past with not that much misfortune, it's difficult to imagine how hard she took this first loss.

I was only provided with fleeting incidents of the night that seemed to flicker by like photographs. They occurred in what I assumed to be chronological order: Sakura watching Sasuke walk towards her and then past her; her first teardrop; her anguished questions; his lack of response; his explanation of being 'too different' from them; her confession to loving him; the silence and ultimately, Sasuke's cryptic 'thank you' followed by knocking her out.

I understand that I might put it in a way that sounds bland, but I can assure you that even though I was not provided with the totality of this night, each moment that Sakura remembered appeared to be equally heartbreaking.

What Sakura didn't notice was how Sasuke's eyes creased in sadness at Sakura's confession. I rarely caught this expression from him, and as it skimmed by, I didn't have much time to analyse it. Nonetheless, I could gather that indisputably, Sakura wasn't just nothing to him. He almost seemed apologetic and guilty at Sakura's offerings of love… as if he didn't deserve it. I couldn't decide whether he did or not, really.

But what Sasuke didn't realise was that he wasn't at all that different from Team 7, and I believe he knew that as much as I did. He just had to put up some reason, no matter how fallible it may be, to break Sakura – because he knew whatever he said, she would accept as true.

If I had to choose, I would say that the moment when Sasuke turned around with that wretched and too cynical smirk on his face and rifted behind her was perhaps the most devastating of them all. Sasuke might have fooled Sakura with that expression of his, however he would never fool me. He appears to be the boy who wants revenge and nothing else, but you would have to be a fool to not have noticed that he wanted her, too. Selfishly. Unreservedly.

The last vision I saw until Sakura's memories floating to black was her murmuring her last 'Sasuke-kun' to him for years, and then her falling, falling and falling. She never hit the ground, though.

Sasuke would never had let her.

/

_I had hoped that you'd see my face,_

_And that you'd be reminded that for me it isn't over._

* * *

><p>Firstly, this story is dedicated to the lovely <strong>DeepPoeticGirl <strong>because she will understand this story more than anyone. It's so Sasuke-centric that I had to attempt to make it sort of Team 7-ish, but not to worry, there will be a lot more Sasuke/Sakura fluff and drama soon.

Secondly, though this was originally intended to be a one-shot, after having this story take me away and make me absolutely adore it to approximately 20 000+ words, it's going to be split into a **two or three-shot**.

Lastly, if you don't know who the narrator is yet, I'm keeping it a secret. ;) I enjoyed having this utterly different perspective.

The lyrics are references to the song **Someone Like You **by **Adele.**


	2. Dull

**Psychedelic II**

* * *

><p><em>I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited,<em>

_But I couldn't stay away; I couldn't fight it._

__/

For the next following years, I view Team 7 apart.

It's hard to accept after two years seeing them weave together as the synchronised perfection that they were always able to become. It's even more difficult to accept that they're no longer their rainbow… only separate colours that for two, may brighten, but for one, diminish.

I really should have let them go after seeing them break apart, but for some reason, I was continuingly compelled to Team 7, even if now they were individuals with their own goals. I was endeared to watching Sakura strive towards her dream of bringing Sasuke to the light and watching her grow indescribably along with the development. She was no longer the little girl that needed protection anymore. She had become an independent and dare I say it, a woman at quite a young age.

Nonetheless, she was still white, and I suppose that's what mattered the most.

Kakashi had ceased being their sensei and even though he too remained his shade of green, I know that he had changed more than others would notice of Sasuke's defection. It brought him to an all new level of failure, and forever would it linger in the crevices of his heart and the locks in his mind.

Admittedly, part of the reason for not being Naruto and Sakura's sensei anymore was because he didn't want to turn up in the used-to-be Team 7 training grounds and realise, yes, it's really all true. Sasuke won't turn up.

Naruto, however, arguably took it better than the both of them. He had always been exceedingly perseverant and was able to concentrate on his determination to protect Konoha and of course, bring Sasuke back on behalf of not only him, but Sakura as well. Despite the fact that in the past he was always on the repetition of how most importantly, he wanted to be Hokage—that objective was now blown out of the water. It's funny how much things change with time.

To my unfortunate discovery, Sasuke had transformed the most. He had become the very embodiment of blazing red; intricate with the pleasures of supremacy and retribution. I had come to realise that Orochimaru's curse mark had not only left a scar on Sasuke's neck, but also a source of criminal venom that would pulse in his veins and eventually, seep into his blood.

Even after Orochimaru's death as perpetrated by Sasuke himself, it was too late. Far too late. Some people would say that killing Orochimaru just buried him deeper.

There's one strange thing I noticed as I travelled through with Sasuke the only way I could – through his bloodthirsty rampages. No matter how crazed or controlled Sasuke would be by the curse mark, not once would he kill a child. It was as if a switch was turned on the second his eyes casted upon a young one. He would just stop automatically and pass onto his next target.

If I knew any better, every child he left with their family dead would be of some sorts a redemption of what happened to him when he was young.

But we all knew that no matter how many times he did this, never would the trauma of the Uchiha massacre be erased. Never would the impact or repercussions of it be, either. I wondered if Konoha regretted the decision they made. The coup d'état. I was guaranteed that if I was in their place, I would. Especially with knowing the consequences that it created. The monster that it made Uchiha Sasuke.

The tragedy.

I am aware that previously I mentioned viewing Sasuke's abandonment of Sakura to be one of the most gut-wrenching experiences I had ever witnessed, but nothing would compare with the brokenness of the last two remaining Uchihas, and consequently, their final reunion.

Nothing would ever compare… or so I thought. I suppose I forgot in that moment that Sasuke was always doomed to a life of calamities.

However at the time, it really did seem that devastating. I had seen many things in my lifetime, of course, nonetheless this made me consider how large-scale massacres such as wars are just seen as numbers, statistics – but on the other hand, the death of simply _one_person could prove to be unremittingly haunting.

And undeniably, the death of Uchiha Itachi came rushing like a tsunami onto a beach that failed to be evacuated. The event was an unforeseen substantial blow to Sasuke and in due course, the beliefs that many Konoha citizens held about the city's history.

Well, nobody actually saw it coming. Apart from me. I just hoped that when the knowledge of the truth came, people would begin to understand Sasuke and most vitally, separate him from the clan name, because he was so much more than that.

This was beheld once Itachi's last breaths of air whispered away and I watched him slide against the wall degradingly, falling right beside Sasuke. The motion was such a bloodcurdling thing to watch because it seemed so unreal. It was hard to believe that someone as talented and powerful as Itachi was just… dying. Dying with only a ghost of a smile. Dying with nothing.

Sasuke couldn't give him anything. What could he say? Everything was crashing down, now.

He could only give him a replica of the motion – which unfortunately Itachi was already being too long carried by me to appreciate – by trembling down next to his loving older brother that he had always been and let the rain carry away his tears.

I told you that Sasuke wouldn't cry for a while coming, then again I supposed that this scarcity only made it more precious, more profound, more shattering.

Most of all, his tears reminded me how much he still had that crystalline blue within him.

/

Here comes in the second participant in the Uchiha massacre, Uchiha Madara.

I find it ironic how Sasuke was never the one to be under the hold of someone else—but there he was, being mentally controlled by the manipulative antics of Madara. He was being truthful when he said he shared the hatred towards Konoha that Sasuke now bred, but he was lying when he portrayed his willingness to renew the Uchiha name. Madara had long before been abandoned by the Uchiha clan, and the first thing he would want – after destroying Konoha of course – would be to rid of the entire Uchiha name. Sasuke was the only one standing in his way.

I had never seen pure evil like I had seen in Madara. Orochimaru and his minions had gotten close, but Madara strived with an all new low of malevolence. The effectiveness of his malicious intent was even more outstanding, and to think that someone would have such little conscience to be able to take advantage of someone as emotionally torn as Sasuke was indeed sickening.

I knew his plans as I did with anyone who wanted annihilation. He wanted to see Konoha crushed under his fingers and then finally, the totality of Uchiha in ruin. He would only need to kill Sasuke to achieve this cause, however it always seemed wrong for murder to be the catalyst of Sasuke's death. I always thought that he would survive to live a long, prosperous life. I always believed that when I finally came to standing above him, he would have aged beyond belief.

I never would have imagined that it was much closer than I had pictured.

It doesn't take long for Sasuke's anger against Konoha's choices to fuel into utter need of obliteration of the said city. It takes even less for the remainder of Team 7 to realise that this is a different Sasuke they're dealing with altogether—because he's not Sasuke. He's not Sasuke at all. The second the signs of the curse mark appear, they know they have lost any of his sense for the rest of the fight. Their 'reunions' used to enable some form of communication and little injury before Sasuke decided to leave again, but this time there was a much more cutting edge. This time Sasuke was prepared to have his currents of electricity churning in one of their necks. This time he believed any type of communication was worthless. This time, he was battling to _succeed._

So you could say, their 'reunions' had become impending bloodsheds.

Perhaps that this would be the last. However, once it had been done, they would be wishing that it didn't have to be their last.

It's odd, at first, seeing Sasuke standing not with, but against, Sakura and Naruto. It's odd to see Sasuke allied with the strong evils of the world: Madara and the crafty Akatsuki member, Zetsu, rather than the goods of the world. It's odd to witness Naruto's own eyes shedding into ice. It's odd to accept that Sakura no longer has the opportunity to realise that Sasuke is still the Sasuke she loves because all of her time has been taken away from her.

It's odd because they will come to grasp that this really is the final time. There's no time to change, to make choices, or to lie in what-could-have been. You either kill or be killed.

And that's what is in all of their minds as they fling forward towards each other, not sparing a single second. Though I am the opposite of someone who would feel alive, never in my life have I been more thriving in so many people at once.

You could say how would that be possible given World War I and World War II? Well, that's because most of the armies that participated were made to be mindless machines. Every contestant here, however, has their reasons. They know what they're doing here, and what they are trying to achieve, but also what they will lose.

Naruto and Sakura both know that a possible outcome of this is Sasuke's death, no matter how unfitting it may be to comprehend.

Sasuke is given the task to target Naruto while Madara handles Sakura and Zetsu patrols rather aimlessly, watching for any incoming disturbances. The dual personality knows that sometime he will be required, though, when a person does indeed intervene.

I float through the thoughts and intentions of all of the members as they are striving with my essence within them. Sasuke's mind is completely and utterly empty, apart from the goal of demolishing Konoha. He can't even understand that what he truly wants to destroy are the elders – and Naruto and Sakura have nothing much to do with it. On the other hand, Naruto is shuddering at the potent blunt force attacks that Sasuke conducts, but not once can he get out of his mind this boy was _his best friend._

Madara, as usual, is snickering at this 'pathetic excuse of a ninja' that he assumes Sakura is. Due to his sheer arrogance and automatic underestimating of most of his opponents, it is Sakura who comes to have the last laugh when she shows him exactly how strong she's grown – shattering the ground with one fist and coming from above, smearing his face into blood with the other.

I would say that Madara should not have been blinded with complacency given the loss of his previous but now deceased allegiances of Pein and Konan, and even more so because of the latter whom ridded of one of his arms. He starts to see the pure determination in Sakura's eyes and he wonders where on Earth did she get the mentality to be so fearless against him…

What he doesn't know is the reason is right next to him.

Soon, Madara gets sick of her repetitive antics of physical attack and being one to quickly finish a fight, he calls on the person who simply could. Of course, Sasuke. Springing away from another one of Sakura's surging fists, he falls back and screeches to him with adulterated animosity all too clear in his voice: "_kill _this brat, Sasuke!"

At the command, Sasuke is already far too buried into darkness to swallow the intensity and consequences of such a demand. He merely swerves his head to the target which is now Sakura, and heaves towards her. The sudden fear in Sakura's eyes is adamant as he rushes towards her with spinning lightning in the back of his hand, one that she should have seen much less than she did.

Naruto yells to Sasuke in absolute anger although he knows that nothing he can say would stop the compounding of Sasuke's speed once he got a hold of it.

In a last attempt to protect herself, Sakura channels all of the chakra that she has in her entire body to her hands, creating a chakra shield of some sorts as she holds it in front of her. She waits for the inexplicable force and when it comes, she knows that she can compare it to the pain she felt when Sasuke first defected from Konoha.

The chidori drills into the chakra wall in front of her, and she feels the protection ceasing. Though it prevents the impact from immobilising her vital organs, the suffering remains unchanged. She can feel the electricity churning into her veins and despite the fact that it won't reach her mind or heart quite yet, she can feel the tears cascading slowly down her cheeks.

She looks up at Sasuke through all of the blinding cobalt light and for just a moment, he isn't doing this. He isn't killing her even when he is.

Naruto and surprisingly Madara are too shocked to intervene as they watch the compelling forces of chakra and electricity combine with each other, one trying to overcome the other. It was akin to the meeting of the rasengan and the chidori, but Naruto knows that Sakura's chakra is made with so much of her heart, so much of her dreams. So much of her love for Sasuke and to make him remember who he really is.

The heat of the chidori inches closer and closer to her eyes and soon it becomes too unbearable to watch. She closes her eyes and drifts into her own sense of reverie, even though it is actually a deadly unconsciousness. My own stomach clenches as I witness this, because her white is burning away. She is being conquered by… dare I say it?

…The black of Sasuke.

She takes her last breaths and wobbles once before crashing down into the ground. Her hands are almost numbing from the concentration of chakra, and they fall limply at her sides. Almost mockingly, the sunlight behind her illuminates her glowing pink hair as her head hits the rough earth.

Sasuke's own relinquishing of power shudders through his body and he too collapses onto the ground, landing on his knees. The curse mark recedes and his crimson eyes dull to an onyx.

It is then that he realises what he had done.

By then, Naruto is already running towards Sakura, a rasengan in hand. Naruto knows that after seeing that, he really _can _kill his best friend. He screams at how Sasuke could ever fall low to do this to Sakura, goddammit _Sakura, _but the anguish is unheard to Sasuke's ears.

All he can see is the blood that trickles down Sakura's head and how I swarm in her still open eyes. He's staring at me again. But I'm not laughing like a ghoul, this time.

Sasuke doesn't even attempt to evade the incoming rasengan, but Naruto has a deep intake of breath once it engraves into Sasuke's back, sending him landing on top of Sakura. The fury diminishes immediately at the sight of a vitally wounded Sasuke.

He's still your best friend, Naruto.

But Naruto is expecting too less of Sasuke, and despite the strength of the rasengan, the fact that he is still alive after it being propelled into his back already provides enough evidence that Sasuke is nowhere near dead yet. Unbeknownst to him, Madara had already fled the scene and he could be killed any time now.

However, Naruto just watches. He cannot understand why Sasuke hasn't gotten up yet or why he didn't just avoid the rasengan in the first place because he _should've. _Guilt clouds into Naruto's chest as he sees Sasuke's achingly sluggish breathing and even more so when he wraps his arms around Sakura.

A certain radiance surrounds Sasuke, and it is a glow that Naruto had never seen before. He supposed he could compare it with his own demon fox bloodline, but this luminosity was so _bright_, so _divine. _It was like seeing sunlight emerge from the clouds after a tremendous thunderstorm. It was like revival.

Naruto knew what Sasuke, his best friend, was doing now. He was being _Sasuke. _Not _Uchiha _Sasuke. He was being the boy he used to be, and possibly always will be, when he was in Team 7. When he was saving Sakura… corresponding to what he is doing now.

Naruto finds even himself crying at this moment. I don't blame him. You had to be heartless to not be touched by this reconciliation. _Sasuke, _he felt like saying, _Sasuke, Sasuke, you don't have to do this. It's okay. Tsunade will save her. You don't have to do this. Please, Sasuke. You're going to _kill _yourself._

But no matter how many times he thought it, he could never get it out of his mouth, because perhaps this was the best way that Sasuke could die. The transfer of Sasuke's chakra to Sakura's body would indeed come close to killing him, and although the chances weren't certain, he would be immensely weakened at the least. He was even risking the loss of his abilities and physical mobility as the body was not suited to performing this action, especially given Sasuke's current state.

And once both of them see Sakura's sluggish but sufficient breathing, Sasuke inhales one last time before disintegrating next to her.

/

When Sasuke wakes up, he knows already that he has been kept in Konoha.

He can smell the familiar spring scent of the city and as the scenery of the cherry blossom trees and multiple houses come into view in front of him, along with the seeping sunlight, he identifies easily that he is at the Hokage tower.

Seemingly chained to a chair too, but nonetheless, at the Hokage tower and alive.

Tsunade swivels around in her chair at the awakening of Sasuke. Her expression is ghastly as her honey eyes are more serious than I have ever seen – even when I was within Orochimaru as he battled against her. She does not attempt to hide her frown of disgust as she looks upon Sasuke who is barely hanging onto life, suffering from an immense headache, eroding eyes and wounds in every place on his body imaginable.

"She's alive," Tsunade almost spat at him in loathing out of nowhere, "but no thanks to you." Had Sasuke not been lingering on the line between consciousness and unconsciousness, he would have refuted this comment.

Tsunade sighs at the scarcity of emotion from Sasuke. She stands up from the chair and walks up to Sasuke, glaring at him, as if sick at the sight of him. "I don't know what to do with you, Uchiha." How she says it even makes me feel the bitterness in her voice and how crystal clear it is that she doesn't want to deal with him… more or so get rid of him. And that can only mean one thing.

"I accept that you have eliminated many of the adversaries that we as Konoha citizens have faced in the past and additionally, as you are being held in Konoha, Madara has no means of trying to infiltrate us for the time being," she sighs wearily and the monotony of her voice convinces me that reasoning is nowhere close to saving Sasuke, "but you have changed from what my previous knowledge of you had been."

Her tone seems to soften just a portion, her mind filling with the reminder of one person. "And I can assure you I am not purposely trying to be personal and bias with this outcome, however given the amount of times you have not only attempted to kill Naruto _and _my apprentice as well as other members of Konoha, I am left with no choice but to consider the worst."

She takes a while to say the rest of her decision. I wonder why it does take her quite a long time. Is she regretting it as much as I am beginning to?

"…The worst being that you will never change back and ultimately end up reverting to your previous plans of aggression towards Konoha and its elders." She walks closer towards him as if hoping that a shorter distance between them will communicate the message to him more evidently. She appears as if she believes that if she says it more quietly, perhaps the verdict might not sound as insane or unlawful as it does.

She's almost whispering now. "I am left with no choice but to execute you, Sasuke." It's hard not to notice how she doesn't call him by 'Uchiha.'

He does nothing but nod. Her once glare disperses, long forgotten, and she watches him in what I would call hidden sadness as the Konoha ANBU come to retrieve him and take him away from the Hokage tower, no doubt to decide how his last days would be spent.

Once the door shuts behind the ANBU, her Hokage façade dispenses of itself and she retreats into her seat, bringing sake to her lips and then burying her head into her hands.

_I'm sorry, Naruto… Sakura._

/

Meanwhile, Haruno Sakura is found to be picking up some necessities for the day.

Having just recovered from the collision with Sasuke and being notified of his capture, she would have never expected that just five minutes ago, he was being told of his execution. Hell, who would?

However, news in Konoha has always spread quickly. And it doesn't take long for an obnoxious ANBU to start the chain explosions of the conversation that will be shared by all of the city's population.

Just as Sakura is fetching some milk from the freezer in a supermarket, two younger girls in their teenage years rush past, murmuring words that Sakura has never been too unaware to notice: "did you _hear_? Uchiha Sasuke is being executed! An _Uchiha_!"

Needless to say, the milk splatters to the ground, spilling like blood as the glass bottle shatters into all directions: correlating with the very mood of Sakura. She doesn't even bother to continue her shopping. She just leaves her plastic bags filled with items on the ground and runs faster than she ever has to Naruto's house.

/

"Sakura-chan, this _better _be good! I was preparing to go out with Hinata-chan to some ramen tonight!"

The vibrating voice of Uzumaki Naruto thunders through the hall to the Hokage tower as Sakura drags him along. I can't tell if this motion is reluctant or not because the closer she gets to the tower, the more she looks like she wants to back out and run back home. I don't think she quite wants the gossip around Konoha to be confirmed.

Nonetheless, Sakura easily breaks through the door of the Hokage tower and the abrupt sternness of Sakura quickly silences Naruto. He dismantles himself from Sakura's strangling hold and walks next to Sakura, standing next to her, suddenly as grave as she is. They wait for Tsunade to once again turn around in her chair because they know she'll need all the time she can get to explain this.

"Naruto, Saku—"

"How could you _do _this?" Sakura crushes through immediately, the shock, denial and disappointment a storm in her voice. Her tone is accusative and for once in her life, she is going against her only mentor.

Tsunade takes this less than well. "What do you mean, how could I do this?" Tsunade laughs humourlessly. "Do I dare need to remind you that he tried to _kill _you, Sakura?"

Sakura strides forward and throws her hands onto the desk, though Tsunade is unaffected by the violence of the action. "It's Sasuke! You _know _how much he means to us! You should've found another way."

Tsunade doesn't even bat an eye. "Perhaps he means too much."

At that, Naruto steps forward himself. "No means of disrespect, Tsunade," Naruto says firmly, the sincerity of his voice and the loss of the infamous 'baa-chan' causes the Hokage to raise her eyebrow, "but as a prime medic yourself, you would be aware that it would have been impossible for Sakura to have arrived here alivegiven the strength of Sasuke's chidori if _somebody _hadn't tried to save her." The truth of his words are a chilling earthquake amongst the silence of the room, and apart from Naruto's clenching of his shaking hands, nobody moves.

Tsunade and Sakura are both unaware of this news.

Sakura's wide eyes turn towards Naruto and she finds herself hoping that it was the Uzumaki who saved her life… because that would be so much simpler.

The Hokage's voice is a murmur of disbelief. "Did you save her, Naruto?"

Naruto chuckles. "You know _I _didn't, Tsunade baa-chan." _Then who did_? Tsunade and Sakura both thought simultaneously, even if they well knew the answer. Tsunade just didn't want to admit she made one of the most prevalent mistakes in her life and Sakura didn't need any more complications in her relation to Sasuke.

"We all know that Sasuke did it," Naruto stated the obvious, sounding amused but at the same time defeated. "After all, who else gets to save Sakura-chan, ne? I couldn't imagine anyone else but Sasuke putting his life on the line for her. Even now, Tsunade baa-chan. Even now." He choked within his laughter. He didn't fool anybody. He especially didn't fool me. I felt the very failure and the loss that was now swallowing him up.

And I knew that I could be empathetic as I shared the exact same emotion when every time I saw a human's eyes close, and because of me…

But there was nothing else to be said. Tsunade had made the decision and only in her hands could she change it. If she ever would, it would be on her own terms. So, Naruto unsteadily took Sakura's hand and walked her out of the Hokage tower. They understood this time how hard it was to not only go, but to also leave from the tower at a time like this.

Because it exactly felt like holding on, and then having to let go. Letting go of someone like Uchiha Sasuke was never going to be easy, either. He was a special boy, that one… I could spend years and years convincing myself that I was stronger than this, but he was going to effortlessly become the first human that would ever break my many thousand beating hearts.

For him, they would all soon stop, even if it was just for a few seconds.

/

Well, I suppose that this would be the right time to cheer you all up with a positive revelation, because this story has long been going downhill.

A few hours after Tsunade's discussion with Naruto and Sakura, she grew to become compelled to visit the solitary confinement jail cell that Sasuke was being held in. She felt obligated to give something back to him… someone who she had stated to be a threat to Konoha, a demon, incurable.

It was ironic, really. But if I had to choose anyone, I would know that Sasuke would be the person to shed some light in the darkest of days.

Usually the Hokage would never go to a location such as a prison because it would be seen as too 'unsafe' for someone as high status as they were, but Tsunade insisted. The ANBU had gazed upon her questioningly, wondering why _anyone _would want to see Uchiha Sasuke, though I believed that the real question is why everyone wasn't.

Even through the gloomy crevices of the solitary confinement that Sasuke was held in, Tsunade knew he was in there from the midnight glimmering of his hair that was highlighted by the moonlight through the miniscule window. His eyes were pitch black, like a predator in the night, as they watched her walk into the cell.

"Hokage," he muttered, not at all in distain or scornfulness, but in relenting. He was caged in the cell like a diseased animal, held against the wall with locked chains around his arms and legs. She almost cringed at the ring around his neck.

She walked forward and with an enhanced chakra technique (as was required), the chains sizzled and broke with the potential energy. Even with this action that spoke for itself, Sasuke said nothing.

Tsunade stepped back. "I haven't changed my mind, Uchiha," she reprimanded, though it was hard not to fall into a soothing voice, "but you are allowed to wander around in Konoha on your own premises. However, there will be a chakra mark indented on your neck for monitoring purposes. If you try to escape, you will be shocked unconscious, like a Taser." To be honest, she didn't even know herself why she said this, because she knew he wouldn't attempt to escape. He appeared to be far too beaten down to even try to _run._

Nonetheless, Sasuke gave no reaction to her threat. He just continued to stare at her, as if impatient for her not getting to the point.

Tsunade gave a weary sigh and unlocked the metal door of the solitary confinement cell. Opening and standing beside it, she waited for him to stand up and leave. It took him a while. His motion of standing up was weak and trampled, and his walking steps were even worse. He slowly trudged towards her and the speed made him look like he was carrying a tonne of weight on his back. This time, she closed her eyes before she announced the next thing.

"Sasuke, you have two days," she almost inaudibly said, continuing to not look at him, because she didn't want to see the expression on his face. However, she couldn't ignore the ceasing of steps next to her. If you had to ask me, for a Hokage, she was rather indecisive.

Had she been looking, she would have seen the forlornness whirling in Sasuke's withering eyes. "Hn," he mumbled. "I expected less."

And as she finally opened her eyes to watch him leave, resembling a man on death row like he was, she could only think one thing.

_You should expect a hundred years._

I, for one, believed he deserved eternity.

/

_Don't forget me, I beg_

_I remember you said that sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead._

* * *

><p>Don't hate me for to-be executing Sasuke. I haven't yet decided if I really am yet or not, though.<p>

**Thank you** for all the story alerts.


	3. Revolutionize

**Psychedelic III**

* * *

><p><em>Regrets and mistakes—<em>

_They're memories made._

/

And Uchiha Sasuke's doomsday clock ticks to one.

The guilt is unquenchable now. It is as if I'm carrying a weight on my shoulders. I have always carried the weight of hearts on my hands, because people have died countlessly before me. But I have never felt guilty for someone who was still alive, someone whose heart wasn't in my hands quite yet. However, as I watched him, his walking stance was still confident, strong and infallible. It was as if he wasn't dying tomorrow.

Almost.

But there is one thing that makes everything different. Today, he is walking to Sakura.

Ever since his return, the interaction between the pair had been minimal. Sasuke was aware that Sakura might've needed time to adjust to his return and perhaps to forgive him again, but she never even spared him a glance anymore. She just worked herself off on patients every day, and he assumed she was doing the same again. He was correct.

As he entered the hospital, the nurses didn't care for telling him that Sakura was busy. Who cared, anyway? He was dying tomorrow. Yeah, who cares. They just simply gave him the number of the room and watched him trotter off with countless accusing whispers behind him.

He saw that she was tending to many patients, and he stood against the side of the door, observing quietly. He wondered how long it would take her to realise her presence. Maybe she actually did already and just decided to brush it off. After minutes, Sasuke realised that the latter was probably what was happening.

"Sakura," he called, his voice deep and cautious. The last thing he wanted was a temperamental Sakura.

She didn't reply for a long time. When she did, she turned to him and leaned against the table, two arms crossed on her chest. She looked at him expectantly. "What do you want?" She trailed her eyes onto his body, noticing that he had no wounds for her to treat. Confusion swept through her.

Sasuke stalled for a moment. What did she mean, what did he want? Didn't she know…?

He cleared his throat, his onyx eyes piercing. She no longer blushed or flinched under his gaze anymore. "I am being executed tomorrow."

She returned to her utensils, setting them back into their ordered places in the drawers. He accepted that she was pondering. "So I have heard," her voice was unusually soft. She turned back to him again. "But you know that I know that already. What are you really here for, Sasuke?"

He hadn't heard the honorific of Sasuke-kun for three years now. Admittedly, it shook him. Her name calling now sounded so detached and uncaring, as if he no longer held the statue of importance that he used to.

"I thought you would want to talk," he replied, quieter this time.

She smiled. He noticed how her smile was no longer so innocent or carefree anymore. When she smiled, she looked so tired, so sick of life. Her smile was scarred and adulterated. "You deserve it," was all she said. It was a statement of fact.

Sasuke sighed, brushing his hair back with his hand. "Do you always have to take things so seriously?"

She laughed, a bitter, ironic laugh. "Do I, really?" She tapped her finger on her chin, being mockingly thoughtful. "You tried to kill me more times than I remember."

He scowled. "Well, you also did the same," he pointed out, stubborn.

She nodded, her tone of voice now finding a new blunt honesty. "Yes, I did. I tried to kill you for Naruto, for Konoha. Say Sasuke, why did you do it for, when you wanted to drill that lightning inside of me?"

He didn't reply.

"Did you even have a reason?" She could barely whisper it. She still believed, he could see, that she thought he considered her as a hindrance; someone who was merely in his way.

Her expression tightened. "One day Sasuke, you need to grow up," there was an edge of animosity in her voice, but his eyes narrowed, daring her to go on. "One day, you need to realise that you can't survive this world by yourself. You need emotions – respect, care, dignity. You need to learn that you're not better than everyone else. If anything, you're below us now."

She knew her words are bitter, perhaps more bitter than they should've been. She was all too aware of Sasuke's saving of her—but no matter how much she tries, she cannot be _kind _in front of him. She is so afraid, so afraid of being hurt by him. However, the truth is, she would always be hurt anyway.

Sasuke chuckled dryly. "You're still in love with me, Sakura."

And as the tears formed in her eyes, he knew that hit a notch. But he didn't realise that he swung her the wrong way. Her arms were no longer crossed on her chest, but on her sides, her fists clenching until they were a pale white. "I don't even know who you are anymore, Sasuke." All she could see was his arrogance, his complacency, his condescending aura. She couldn't see his blue.

And to be honest, I couldn't either.

She shook her head, biting her cheeks. "It doesn't even matter anymore… don't you realise?" She stared him straight in the eyes. She remembered how his eyes used to tranquilise her, how they made her feel so safe, so beautiful. "You've been dead for five years now, Sasuke. Just because you're dying tomorrow physically doesn't mean it'll change anything. It'll still be the same."

At those words, Sasuke grew angry. What happened to her? What happened to the Sakura that had all her individuality and was just herself? Now she seemed like a conformist who hated him just like the rest. What happened to the Sakura that loved him…

He clenched his jaws and walked towards her in long strides. She stared at him in fear. Not for him, but from him. His Sharingan was activated and his eyes now bled red. He took her by the shoulders, clasping her shoulder blades so strongly. "Do you still love me, Sakura?" His question was marred by fury. She felt the pain shaking through her veins at his grasp. She struggled to form her voice.

She smiled, a different one, a broken one. "Do you want me to lie or say the truth?" The tears were bottled up in her eyes.

"Lie," Sasuke answered. For once, he wanted a rejection that never sounded so beautiful to his ears. Or so he thought…

She steadied herself. "Alright."

Breathe in, out.

She grasped his cheek, stroking it so gently. He froze at the touch, staring at her with such intensity. It reminded of him when they were back in Team 7, when everything was flying colours. I remember it too. And this sheer moment between Sasuke and Sakura, white and blue, the two colours that made up the sky… broke me entirely. They were so tragic, these two. It was when you knew you loved them so much but…

A lone tear fell down her face. "I love you, Sasuke-kun."

…you had to let them go.

And when Sasuke needed to hear her last proclamation of love, it came in the most painful way. It burned in his head and he knew it was a lie. But his Sharingan remembered it, and it was forever buried into his mind. Maybe, if he repeated it for long enough, he could perfect it to the stage where it was the truth.

He let go of her shoulders.

She mustered the best smile that she could, but now her expression was a wrecked disaster. The tear stains reappeared and it hit her hard, it really did. In less than twenty-four hours, he would be dead. He would no longer have a beating heart, and she knew I would be standing above him. She knew that for the first and last time, she would be unable to save him from me.

She was useless.

She took another breath in. "I'm sorry," she said, peering up at him. She felt that she needed to say it then, but she didn't quite know if she meant it. She never knew what she felt anymore. "You should go now, Sasuke." _don't leave me. don't leave me. don't leave me. _

He nodded. I wonder how he always stayed so strong. It was impeccable. This was even when he knew that she was long gone from his grasp. Even when they were floating in an ocean, attempting to stay alive by holding together. Even when they had let go and were drifting away from each other in the distance. The worst thing about losing someone was that it was a failure. You watched them fade away.

You can never get her back, Sasuke.

He observed her as she returned once again to tending to the patients. He saw how she was struggling to stay standing and how her fingers trembled with every touch, but he had to leave. He had to leave now, or he wouldn't ever.

"Goodbye," he said. They both knew that it was more than a simple retreat at the end of a conversation.

At that, he swiftly twisted around, his back now facing her. He slammed the door behind him as he walked out of the hospital. Anything to forget…

Sakura stood staring at where he had been for no more than five seconds before she collapsed against the door and cried for the first time alone in many years.

/

I know.

I should have been proud by the news that Sakura had finally let go of Sasuke so I could have his finishing life all to me now, but I don't believe that anything could've made me feel a fraction happy at this resolution.

I've never been the type to be dancing around with the daises or down in the dumps because I've always been an ambiguous and at most times, nonchalant when it came to moods. However, I can assure you that some people manage making my job not so easy… namely Uchiha Sasuke. Nonetheless, it would not have been as hard without Haruno Sakura, Hatake Kakashi and Uzumaki Naruto. I knew that all too well.

As they say, there's nothing difficult about leaving. It's only the things you leave behind that makes it so.

And I suppose, Sasuke would be leaving a lot of things behind in life when his end arrived. He might be leaving more than he could ever imagine. You could say that it's insane for him not to try and get them back before his eyes close for the last time. But Sasuke has never been the person to do things. On the inside, he's a self-defeating boy who believes that he deserves nothing.

For certain, he's done a multiple amount of bad things, but they are nothing when they come into comparison to what I have done. He may have hands that are scarred with blood but I know that unlike him, my entire body is bludgeoned. Perhaps because of the fact I have been through more, I am more accepting to the extremes of personalities. However… for the first time, I can't find any justifications to taking his life away.

However, there was one person that Sasuke would want to be cradled in his arms when I took life away from him. And it wasn't the popular opinion that it would be one of his family members, because no matter how much he woke up from the endless massacre nightmares or painfully reminiscent dreams, he would never get them back. They were dead and gone.

Sasuke decided that he should be living in the present. Living in the past didn't do him much good.

He would always have desired—no, _needed _to know beyond doubt that Sakura still loved him. From day one, she was perfection. She was everything he wasn't, yet everything he would ever want, ever need. He knew that if he was so lucky to ever be endeared by her that he would receive the blessing of being purified by the innocence of her; because he was so broken down. Broken down by the Uchiha name. Broken down by Orochimaru. Broken down by Itachi. Broken down by Madara. _Broken down by himself._

Sakura was white and he was black. He so hoped, for once, that with her he would be maintain that crystalline blue. I found it ridiculous that he would think he could never do that by just himself. Though Sasuke was seen as a heartless murderer, Sasuke did one thing the best. He made chances. He made change. He made _life. _He was the strength of so many people that he would never be aware of.

Later in the night on the same day of the brutal rejection from Sakura, Sasuke supposed that he had nothing left to lose. Could life really get any worse? I agreed that it couldn't... even if I had seen the quality of life being drilled down into the core of ground zero.

Sasuke supposed that he could pay one more visit to Sakura, because at least with trying, he had the chance of winning her back. After all, the love of Sakura made the prospect of being executed by firing squad not so horrid—despite the fact I, myself, believed that firing squad was one of the most defaming and cruel forms of execution. Perhaps only trailing behind hanging. It was still hard to differentiate, though.

He turned up at Sakura's suburban home after hours of wrestling with his thoughts, hours of defeating himself and hours of believing that the worst circumstance would happen. He came to Sakura's door with the same confidence and _you have to do this _mentality as he had earlier at the hospital, but he was so much more desperate.

He rang the bell once. Twice. She knew he was there.

She opened the door on the fourth ring, slowly, as if trying to unmask his appearance at her home as gradually as possible. She peeked through the gap of the door before his entire being came into reality. She looked up at him expectantly, however she couldn't ignore how the moonlight of the night highlighted the blue circles under his eyes, the wrinkles that were emerging and how damn _tired _and _beaten_ he looked. How much he wasn't Sasuke, but at the same time, so right.

How much he was blue.

"What do you want?" She got to the point.

He stared at her, his eyes deader than she had ever seen them. She was frightened for him. _How could he do this to himself? _I thought that how he _couldn't_ was the real question. Nonetheless, following pursing his lips, he spoke quietly. "To talk."

She sighed, rolling her eyes. "We have talked." Don't be so harsh, Sakura. He saved you. He saved you. Sasuke. _Sasuke. _You would be dead. Now he is. Sasuke. **Saved you.** She was attempting to hold up her façade for as long as she could, but she knew if he kept sparing time like this, she wouldn't last much longer.

"Sakura." He said, definitively, pleadingly. _please. please let me in. because i promise, goddamn, i swear to you, i don't want to be on my deathbed tomorrow realising that i've lost you forever. realising that you're not mine, but i'm still yours. realising that i really have lost _everything. _you are my everything._

She replied with nothing and just opened the door completely to motion for him to come in. He walked past her, and when he did, she blinked away the tears. She turned away from the shadow of the door after doing so, making sure that she didn't appear as hurt as she really was, before watching him sit down on the couch and wait for her. The second she sat awkwardly down next to him, she felt the rush of the uneasy atmosphere. She felt the lies between them and everything that should've been said but was bit back with false bravado. Everything that was such a disaster, such a tragedy, such angst, such _Sasuke and Sakura. _

She was looking at the ground, unclenching and clenching his fists when she cast her watery eyes upon him. He was battling with himself—then again, when was he not? He breathed in before speaking, the crystalline blue trickling through his voice like the rejuvenation of winter rain. The colour she should've seen, but realised too late. "I'm sorry," he started with, and at first she couldn't believe it, however when she looked through the words and stretched her ears enough, the sincerity and the absolute _pain _and _regret _was there.

He finally brought up the courage to look into her eyes, and when he did, his was a mirror of hers. She broke. _sasuke, oh god, sasuke. sasuke. don't cry. sasuke. i love you. I LOVE YOU. sasuke-kun._

"I always end up like this," he mumbled, ashamed of himself, ashamed of everything that he done. Everything in the past, the present, and what would come of the future. Ashamed of how he had hurt her. "I can't seem to ever give you want, Sakura. I can't ever say the right thing, or do the right thing, or even _know _what the right thing is. I can't—_fix _you. And even though I have all the power of the world, being the last Uchiha survivor... I have the Mangekyou. I have my brother dead. I have everything I would have ever wanted, yet, I have nothing. Because Sakura..."

He looked like was going to choke. He was struggling. "...Because... I don't have you," he finished. He brought his hand into hers, and she was shaking, shaking so much. She didn't know what to say, she didn't know what to do. She couldn't help to think what a mistake she had made earlier in the day lying to him, because now he believed she didn't love him, when God, _she did._

The resilient defensive mechanism of a smirk appeared on his face. The expression she knew was something she had seen before. It was an exact replica of the very night he had defected from Konoha. "After all this time, you're still soannoying, Sakura. So, so annoying..." _because even if i don't ever deserve any part of you, i still want it, and i still need it. i'm still as selfish as a bastard as ever, because i still strive after your love. so, say you love me. say you love me and mean it. or don't mean it at all. i would take anything now._

This time, she saw through his words. She didn't flinch back at the unforgettable phrase or act irrationally in response. She understood all the cracks in his eyes and how every second he was dying, but yet, still needed her. She laughed weakly and the same light and feathery rosy blush that he had missed for so long sprung onto her cheeks, along with a sweet, small smile. She squeezed his hand and together, they became the white and blue that I would never give up on them being. They became their own rainbow, their own sky. I cherished them.

"Sasuke-kun," she spoke, childishly with the untouched persona that she was, "you're so silly." She pinched his cheeks and only gave her a half-hearted glare. This was her own way of forgiving him and forgetting that he really was being executed tomorrow. They could pretend...

Her eyes took a more serious turn. "Sleep with me. Let's just lie together, Sasuke-kun." _because i want to have you before i lose you, too. _To anyone else's ears it would've sounded like a sexual invitation, but it wasn't. It was chaste. He comprehended that she wanted to feel everything that she was going to lose. She wanted to embrace everything about him that could've been—everything that _they _could've been. This was some wretched but wonderful form of emotional suicide, but she wanted to take the jump.

She stood up from the couch and walked up to the stairs where her bedroom was. "Will you, Sasuke-kun?" Her voice was soft and her eyes were warm, and he would never have the will to disagree. He wanted to take the jump.

So, she undressed into her pajamas and he simply took his shirt off before they laid in bed together, staring up at the ceiling. He pulled the quilt over them for comfort and following that, he wrapped his muscular arm around her waist, hauling her towards his side and brushing her forehead with the most gentle of kisses. It was like a dream, and perhaps, it was. It was as if they were a newly-wed couple, about to enjoy the rest of their years.

"Sakura?" his husky voice broke through the comfortable silence.

She tilted her body to face him. "Hmm?" She opened her eyes to see him crying.

"...H-Hn," is all he managed. _sakura, i love you. can you... just for tonight?_

He looked disoriented and muddled with as he cried, but it didn't matter, because she was crying as well. "Thank you." _of course i will._ _but for the rest of my life._

Her hot breath fanned over Sasuke's face, and he just held her closer. Their tears melded together, the mutuality erupting like a supernova explosion. They were both aware that this would be the last time they could ever be this close.

/

On the morning of Sasuke's execution, the sky had never been so bright, so vibrant with colours. With my millions of years of age, I have never seen anything quite striking.

Throughout the night the lone Uchiha had not slept any second. He had just sat upright for every passing hour next to Sakura, watching her sleep. Admittedly he hadn't seen her sleep at all that often, but even if he had, he wouldn't have ever seen her as more beautiful as she was now. It was as if today wasn't the day he was being executed, how peaceful she looked. It was as if it was a fine, new day for Team 7 to be renewed again.

Her pink hair was tangled everywhere on the pillow, and she leant sideward towards him, one arm across her chest and the other clenching the quilt to her. She looked so snuggly and warm, but he could still see the hints of tears on her face. The question still remained in his head though, had she really lied yesterday? Had she really stopped loving him, the man she said she would for forever five years ago?

And even though five years was a long time (more than superfluous to allow for change), he thought he had never felt more perfect, sitting next to her in a bed.

Usually the stereotype was that the couple would engage in love making and then wake up to see each other and that would conclude as the most peaceful moment in their life, but Sasuke had never been a type for physical contact. Indeed, I had known that for quite a while. He wasn't much of a man for words either. Even if he preferred to live without physical contact, this didn't mean that his actions didn't communicate the most. Sasuke believed that this very chaste and innocent zeitgeist quite fit them.

Sakura was never one for being a rush, anyway. She was always so endearing in a gentle and quiet way. She hadn't even made Sasuke cuddle or hug her. She just wanted him to stay for the night, and he knew she wouldn't have minded if he slept on the couch downstairs. But he felt for tonight, just tonight, he would.

He stared at her, piercingly. It was the early morning, about six 'o' clock. The sunlight had already appeared and was lying softly on her face, as if highlighting her angelic paleness. If only… if only… Sasuke shook his head. He knew just as well as I did that in a matter of some mere hours, his heart would stop beating. He had to let her go. Even though he knew that he could quite easily make Sakura cling to him and be his for the rest of her living days, he wouldn't. That would be much too selfish.

So he silently stood from the bed. He spent quite a while, I remember, looking at Sakura before he even made an effort to leave the bedroom. He also spent quite a while appearing to be on the verge of anguish. I knew Sasuke would never cry about such a romantic issue as this, but his eyes never seemed to have so many cracks than at this moment. Once he was done, he took a shuddered intake of breath and then slowly made his exit.

As he left her cosy and small house that seemed to be growing its own arms, grasping him and attempting to pull him back in, he shook the thoughts off and dialled a simple, memorable number on his mobile phone.

It only took three rings.

"Naruto, let's have some ramen."

The Uzumaki had never heard such words in the entirety of his eighteen years of life.

/

The soon-Hokage was more than beaming as he approached Sasuke in the all too familiar ramen stand.

Naruto today was painted quite wonderfully in the colour of yellow. Though both were aware of the impending fate, I had never seen him so happy, so delightful. Naruto was always the type to live in the moment. In the next few hours, he and Sasuke would be perfect. Like the brothers they would've been.

"Teme," he yelled to the Uchiha, grin nearly stretching over his face, "I told you that one day you'd ask me for some ramen!"

Sasuke just scowled and beckoned for Naruto to walk faster and sit down. Naruto teasingly took his time, but let out a sigh of solid relief as he sat down. With two arms braced behind his head, he just laughed. But soon, his expression changed to that of irritating and exploding curiosity.

Sasuke knew that expression all too well, and his scowl deepened – but Sasuke wasn't at all that angry.

"Where were you yesterday, teme?" At this, Naruto leaned forward, his grin suddenly becoming more deceptive. It was as if he already knew the answer, but wanted Sasuke to spit it out. The Uchiha's thin lips were set into a line, stubborn.

"None of your business, dobe," Sasuke replied, dismissively. He graced the cup of water in his hands and took a sip slowly, though his eyes averted elsewhere.

Naruto stuck his tongue out like a young child and laughed again. Sasuke was irritated by his still-existing youth. "I know you were with Sakura-chan," Naruto burst into a fit of laughter after saying such: his pronunciation of 'Sakura-chan' was much too childish, suggestive and high pitched.

The other boy just glared at him, muttering some words of encaging his best friend into a painful illusion of his Sharingan soon, but he was still submissive. "Fine," Sasuke hissed, and Naruto just laughed further at this dramatic antic, "I was with her."

Then, Naruto's expression was washed with understanding. Sasuke seemed utterly bothered with Naruto intruding with 'his business,' and this only proved that Sakura was a touchy subject to him. To most people Sasuke didn't show that much importance towards Sakura, but unfortunately for him, Naruto could actually read between the lines.

"I'm going to miss you too, you know, Sasuke," Naruto said, as if it was a reminder, as if Sasuke didn't know.

Sasuke just nodded stiffly. "I know."

Naruto smiled tentatively. "I will, a lot," he choked on the last two words, and the Uchiha quickly found himself wound up in his constricting arms.

Sasuke shuffled uncomfortably in the grip. "Dobe, you're choking me!"

Naruto let go gradually. "I'm sorry, Sasuke," he said quietly, feeling that it needed to be said. "I could've done more for you." _i could've done more to save you._

The Uchiha shook his head, wanting more than anything to end the uncomfortable subject. "You brought me back," he stated, reassuringly.

And back then, two years ago, that would've been enough to say, because it was their goal. It had always been Team 7's goal to reunite their team again, and that meant bringing Sasuke to Konoha. Back then, it would have been more than enough. But now, things had changed. Now, Sasuke was being executed.

Naruto directed his sad, pearly blue eyes towards Sasuke, whom grunted. He waved his hand at the kyuubi, as if attempting to end the conversation. "Naruto, you tried the best that you can." _you did more than enough for someone like me._

Said boy just laughed, wearingly, remorsefully. "I could have tried more," Naruto pressed, and he was right. He could have. He never had a limit, that boy. However I knew all too well that no matter how hard he had tried, I would always have come to Sasuke. I was inescapable.

Sasuke was now clutching his cup strongly, grudgingly. "Naruto, that's enough," he commanded, and his voice was so domineering and frustrated that Naruto knew he had to listen. It wasn't because Sasuke wasn't one for personal subjects; it was because he never wanted to see the pain he had caused over the years. He didn't want to face it. He looked down at the table almost regretfully. "The Hokage has made her choice."

And that was really all that needed to be said, for Naruto would only succeed Tsunade next year… far too late.

/

Naruto watched as his best friend was being pulled by ANBU members into the prison on death row.

He didn't want to believe it one bit, but it was happening. They chained him up brutally, not caring if some of the locks were too tight on his skin, or if some of their weapons 'accidentally' scraped him. He clenched his teeth and bore his hands into fists, however he couldn't do anything. He just watched helplessly. Uselessly.

I did too. I had to abide by the decision.

His eyes shimmered with tears and they actually looked like the glistening waves of the ocean. The entire time, Sasuke wore a smirk on his face and stared at Naruto. _this is it. don't cry, dead last. _The blonde held on a smile in response.

Naruto checked the clock on the wall of the sentencing room. 11:30am. He was being executed at midday. Thirty measly minutes... Where was Sakura?

Sasuke seemed to read his thoughts. "I don't want her to come, Naruto." _i don't want to have her see me die and endure through that agony again._

Naruto's continuous answering smile was enough of a reply. _yeah, well. we still wouldn't miss it. not for the world._

/

Haruno Sakura woke up rather late on that morning.

Drearily moving her hand through the bed, she realised that there was an empty space where there had not been before. The pillow was cold next to her. She immediately threw herself up in a sitting position. _Sasuke? _Her mind seemed to scream.

She looked at the digital clock next to her bed. 11:40am. _11:40am. _

She took a while to comprehend that it was ten minutes before Sasuke's execution, and when she did, she abruptly got off the bed and hurriedly dressed herself, dashing out of her home and running as fast as she did when she last woke up and realised Sasuke had left Konoha.

She wasn't going to let him leave them forever this time without a second glance.

/

When she arrived at the site of Sasuke's execution—ironically at the Valley of the End—the identity of Sasuke was already being announced.

11:50am.

There were many Konoha residents, however some of the Sound residents had unknowingly arrived to the event, the notoriety of Sasuke having of course reached their location. There was also a newly constructed metal fence separating the executors and Sasuke from the crowd, and Sakura readily pushed herself amongst the crowd, even using some of her strength at given cases to get to the front.

Sasuke was still hooded and kept against a wooden post as was the tradition for execution by shooting squad, but Sakura ached to see his onyx eyes as she clung to the fence.

11:52am.

"Here lies Uchiha Sasuke," the executor announced, and Sakura thought it was rather morbid as it made the setting sound like a funeral. I supposed that after not long, it would become one. "Uchiha Sasuke is being held today because of his numerous committed crimes, including a defection from Konoha, affiliation to Otogakure and the criminal clan of Akatsuki and ultimately an attempted siege on Konoha with Uchiha Madara. Uchiha Sasuke has progressed into an S-rank missing-nin and by the order of Tsunade, the fifth Hokage, has been sent for execution by shooting squad for, definitively, treason."

The executor then leant towards Sasuke. "Does the persecuted have any last words before he is executed?"

11:55am.

Had Sasuke not been wearing a hood, everyone would have seen his smirk as he spoke. "To have myself executed with open eyes." The statement was so bold and frank that whispers swept through the crowd, most of them (as Sakura could eavesdrop on) comprising of the wonderment for the reason of why he would want to do that. Even the executors seemed to be taken back, but nonetheless, they unravelled the hood from his head carefully.

The second the clothing was taken off, his eyes immediately met with Sakura's, and his smirk only increased. _so you came._

Sakura felt a warm clasp of a hand reach hers, and looking beside her, she saw Naruto, his eyes once again brimming with tears. They both nodded and looked towards Sasuke who had not stopped staring at them. However, something was different. He was mouthing words.

_you could be happy._

11:58am.

From that, Naruto couldn't hold in the tears and his head collapsed onto Sakura's shoulder, sobbing. The crowd turned to them and I hope, that for once, they acknowledged them the way that I did. The Team 7 that went through so much anguish and held so strong, even if they didn't deserve much of the treatment that they received. I knew that Team 7 was not completed today with the absence of Hatake Kakashi, however, no matter how much he was late by, he would always come at the most opportune time... exactly as I had before. And today, he did the same.

11:59am.

Kakashi arrived on the other side of Naruto and he ruffled his hair comfortingly. When the sensei finally looked at Sasuke, he had to hold in the tears himself. This boy was his _prodigy. _He honestly didn't care how many cases of treason he had committed—this boy was, and always will be, his _son_ of some sorts. Wrapping their arms amongst each other, they brought each other in with as much perseverance as they could. The best that they could make with a minute left.

A minute.

Sixty seconds.

The executors cocked their guns and posed themselves into the according position, standing all in front of Sasuke. Even with this, the brilliant boy did not take his eyes away from the members of (his) Team 7. Even as I entered into his body, unwillingly wrapping my arms around him into the constricting death hold and watching his clock tick down, he held himself with the crystalline blue that he would _always _return to.

No Sharingan. No Uchiha name. No blood on his hands. No curse mark. Just Sasuke.

My hold became tighter and tighter. _i'm sorry, sasuke. i'm so sorry._

Yes. For once, I was sorry. Truly.

With ten seconds left, Sakura clenched the metal fence. She mouthed her own words. The answer Sasuke had always been waiting for, his entire life.

_sasuke-kun, i love you so much. _

I believe that after the confession when he gazed up to the interlocked blue, white, yellow and green sky of Team 7, he saw more than just his father, mother and brother. I believe that he saw me too, looking down at him, and for the first time in my life with him, I saw him smile at me.

12:00pm...

_it's okay, _he seemed to be saying to me. _you can do this._

My thousand hearts stopped beating. I told you it would happen.

I can assure you, my heart was breaking much more than the entire of Team 7. But, my thousand hearts took pace again, and I nodded, draining all of his life with my hands. The executors cocked their guns for the last time, and within a millisecond, hundreds of bullets were shot. The sound was unforgettable. It echoed through the Valley of the End, rocketing through the mountains and sailing over the seas. Everyone, at that time, was silent.

As Sasuke's head fell limp, Sakura buried her head into hands, falling onto her knees, crying uncontrollably. Naruto followed not soon after, only leaving their sensei standing. He could not stop staring at Sasuke's motionless body. He had lost him. They all had.

Up above, Tsunade turned away from the Hokage tower window and was not afraid to cry herself.

I let go of Sasuke's body, shocked by the feeling of having actually killed him. Astounded. Appalled. Ashamed. Destroyed. I have never cried myself in my entire life time, and I don't believe I can even produce tears. However, I was never meant to be able to feel emotions either, and that was thrown at the window. In this moment, I spent more time than I usually would caressing Sasuke's cold cheek with my hand and secretly pleading that his eyes would open, though I knew it not to be true.

I clasped my arms around him as he was carried away by the executioners, his body covered with a leather bag. I felt his soul sizzle through his body and vibrate through my own, reaching up to the heavens.

I know that in the past I have weighed up many momentous moments, such as Sasuke's defection, Itachi's death and of course, the undeniable weight of the execution. Nevertheless, I was prepared to not be faced with any more of these periods as Sasuke had died, but Konoha once again proved me wrong. Kakashi leant down to the fallen Naruto and Sakura and threw his arms around the both of them, saying nothing. Shortly after, the friends of the group being Ino, Shikamaru, Shino, Kiba, Lee, Gaara, Hinata and many more joined the embrace. I watched the crowd accumulate into the enormous collection and soon all of the residents that had arrived at the execution were holding themselves all together, side by side, hand in hand.

Nobody had really thought... what would life be without Uchiha Sasuke?

In the end, it didn't really matter that he was an S-rank missing-nin. It didn't matter that he attempted siege on Konoha. It didn't matter that he had become a part of opposition groups such as the Akatsuki. It didn't matter that at some parts of his life, he had morphed into evil. And this was the end, and all that mattered was that he was originally a Konoha ninja, and he would always be _treasured. _They had ignored the truth that he died being one too, but when the guns were unloaded, it became all too blatant.

He was Sasuke. Member of Team 7. The reason of Hatake Kakashi. The growth of Uzumaki Naruto. The heart of Haruno Sakura. Yet, at this time, everyone felt the loss. But after all, as they say, you only realise what you had when you lose it. And having loved and lost is better than having had nothing at all.

They all obtained the blessing of having had Uchiha Sasuke, and I could thoroughly support that.

And that was enough.

/

_Who would have known how..._

_Bittersweet this would taste?_

* * *

><p>um. I loved this story. So I wrote raw and unedited angst. And I'm pretty damn proud of it. I still love this. Many moments while writing the story my own eyes were brimming with tears. I literally felt the pain of something I had created. Man, this was tragic. I probably will come back to edit it though, because I'm pretty OCD, but I feel <em>accomplished.<em>

Don't hate me for actually executing Sasuke, but I wanted my story to be different from others. I didn't want to have the whole ordeal where somehow he unrealistically gets saved, because the whole purpose of this story was to accentuate the tragedy that was Sasuke, and interlock him with Death, who was the narrator. It was basically tying up all loose ends. I've got to say I loved writing as Death because it's such a complex personality.

**Reviews are very much appreciated. **:)Thank you for all the story alerts/favourites!


	4. Author's Note

Dear readers of Psychedelic,

I just wanted to pass by with a quick thank you because I have been so delightful to receive all of these reviews which have been so much more praising than I've ever gotten. I'm sorry to the many of you which I have caused to cry, but I am glad that my writing was able to convey the emotion of Sasuke interlocking with Death as I had intended.

For the people that are asking, yes, I might be making an Epilogue, perhaps either in Death's perspective or this time Sasuke's as a soul, looking over the remaining of Team 7. Perhaps I'll even write both. Yeah. I love this story too much.

Once again, thank you. :)


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